Tuesday, December 30, 2008

We Need Love....

When " Singles Ladies" comes on you can find women swaying their hips in the club, doing the choreography in their living rooms or moving their hands left to right in the car . But the question is are all singles ladies really content with being single? Do they really enjoy going home to their empty bed? Do they really like going out with all their friends , who at the end of the night have some one to go home to?

Many people are single by circumstance and others by choice. Relationships are like viruses some catch them and others don't . I must admit ....I am a hopeless romantic. I always try to find the beauty in love, even though currently I am not in it. I love to see people in love ,because I have hope my turn is coming .I think a lot people these days have given up on the power of love for many reasons like,sexual indiscretion,lying, incompatibility,differences and immaturity. Or better yet they just are not equipped for it .
I read today that Eva Marcille Pigford is engaged to Lance Gross . They are the inspiration for my post .Gross spoke to Essence.com about his engagement and said," I knew the day I laid eyes on her because I just got that feeling.She took full control of my heart and is the only woman that has ever made me feel that way—that’s how I knew she was special.” After reading this I wondered does love at first sight really exist? I honestly can't answer that . I just believe when love chooses someone there is no way to runaway from it.

Now love for everyone has not been a fairytale. It has caused many heartache and pain. What makes love so unpredictable is that one does not know the expiration date.It can last for a season or lifetime. Love that goes wrong teaches you to forgive, not necessarily forget. Love teaches you life lessons and prepares you for next time. In life everything happens for a reason .Love that doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

One must love themselves first ,before they can truly love someone else .Love is not a substitute for completion , but a remedy for loneliness. At the end of the day, everybody needs love.
As the New Year approaches I know quite a few people have vowed to never love again and if they do, not to give it away so freely . Some people have to be made a believer when it comes to love .Love should never be underestimated. I have learned as a believer in God, (this goes for anything),if it can happen for your neighbor , it can DEFINITELY happen for you .

Monday, December 29, 2008

My Rose

December 30, 2007 marks the day that my grandmother Rose Marie Clark-Johnson died . It marks the day I lost my twin and biggest fan. The day I lost the woman whose hips I inherited. The day I lost the lady who gave birth to my father . The day I lost the woman who called me "her heart".
Gigi ,as she is affectionately known was a very unique woman . She knew how to walk into a room and make everybody laugh . Everyone that knew her would say" Now you know Rose is crazy." In one breathe she would cuss you clean out and in the other tell you she loved you and pass you a twenty dollar bill.

I shared countless memories with her. I remember going to her house for the Martin Luther King Jr. Parade on 62nd street and 23rd Ave drinking jug juices and hot dogs . I remember going to Goombay in The Grove dancing with the Junkanoo. I remember her letting me drive her van when I was 14 , it was our little secret . I remember going to her house with a virus, she nursed me back to health and took me on a shopping spree. I remember her giving out gifts and she always gave me a little extra.

She was notorious for meeting someone and giving them another name.I remember she had nicknames for me and my sisters. My older sister was her first love , my little sister was her passion and I was her heart.

She was a spunky, feisty, assertive , aggressive, humorous ,beautiful petite woman . She didn't have an old bone in her body . She came from a family where she was the only girl of five boys .So much so we couldn't call her grandma it was either Gigi , or auntie Gigi.She had a giving heart and was the life of the party . She was a true friend and one you could always count on. She was truly one of a kind.You could always find her in The Grove , Liberty City or Perrine at a funeral wake , social event , the casino , or just out and about . She was known for her gap , Christmas lights ,purple van and her pseudo personality, Conswella De La Rosa .

Ever since I was little, I dreaded the day she would no longer be here . Now it is a year later that she has been gone and It still has not set in for me . I find myself thinking about her everyday . The way she said my name . The way she walked. The she wore her hair . The way she sang . The way she laughed . The way she smiled. The way she danced.The way she loved me .

Although she is no longer here in body she left pieces of her on earth. I carry a piece of her with me everyday . When I look in the mirror at my figure I see her . I see her bright smile, humor , spunk and attitude. I miss her very much and know her existance was not in vain. She was truly a rose . A flower that spreads happiness, offers compassion and ultimately priceless. She gave 100% of herself to many people and she will never ever be forgotten.

To my grandmother and twin. I love you.

Artist of the Week

When I think of style and finesse , one man comes to my mind, Usher . Usher is man that does it , and does it well . I will forever be a fan of his . His music has gotten me through somethangs. Whether he is married to Tameeka or not .. I will always be his number one fan.lol I dedicate this post to him. This is one of my favorite songs by him. I will never forget I was in the 11th grade when I saw him in concert perform this particular song. It took my breathe away. It did not hurt that my dad pulled some strings and got be backstage passes either . I hope you enjoy this as much as I always do.


Your Truly Special ..I Hope You Know Your Special...

Saturday, December 27, 2008

I'm Just My God Given Name

What's in a name? A name represents who a person is . It's the name given to them at birth and one of the only things that goes with them to the grave. Its amazing how a persons name can truly fit their personality, style, and attitude. A name encompasses a person as a whole and makes them who they are.

Growing up I hated my name. I thought it was boring and old sounding . I hated the way it was spelled and rolled off my tongue. I felt like the only person in the whole world with the name Monique. I liked the name Keisha or Tatiana better.

One day I decided to ask my parents why they named named Monique and they told me because it was made for just me. Made for me? I could not understand why. So I decided to define the meaning of my name for myself.

Monique is of French descent. It derives from the names Mona and Monica. It means wonderful counselor or advisor . My middle name is the feminine version of Anthony . It means highly praiseworthy and priceless. It has Latin and French descent . My last name means he who is like God.

Looking at the definition of my entire name it defines who I am .The definition makes me a special and unique person. I am truly my god given name . I am a good friend who offers great advice when called upon .I love to talk so when I start , I can't stop. As an individual I stand out . I don't do things everyone else does . I have my own mind and dance to the beat of my own drum . Although I am sometimes misunderstood I do things my own way and in my own time . I am a go getter , humorous ,highly intelligent and creative . I love to meet and get to know new people . I love to laugh and be happy. When people get to know me, they love me. Even when things in my life are crazy , you would never know it because I keep a smile on my face .I have a pure heart and good intentions. I love LOVE and enjoy spreading it. Even when I make mistakes I try to learn from them . I am beautiful inside and out .I am definitely priceless in a sense that I am one of a kind . I am very spiritual. Everyday I am on a personal journey with god , to be more like him . Ultimately my name is perfect for me and I carry it well .

My mom was right when she said my name was made for me. I understand now why no one else in my class had my name . Why the way it is spelled and pronounced is different. It is because I am different. I never understood why it stands out until I got to know myself and understood who I am . I love my god given name . I am Monique Antoinette . Nothing More and nothing less .

I encourage you to define your name for yourself . You might be surprised of what you may discover. It true when they say its all in the name.

Friday, December 26, 2008

It's all about the chase..

After a long day of shopping ..I can't seem to get Sweet Lady by Tyrese out of my head . I love this song for so many reasons .Sweet Lady exemplifies the beauty of the chase . You know... when a man actually pursues a woman without any games .The type of chase when a man recognizes a woman for who she is and is willing to do whatever it takes to be with her. (This can go both ways however, I'm going to look at it from a female prospective). Women love a man who has taken the time to notice and get to know her. He has admired from afar her intelligence, personality , smile and style . He has asked around about her and is waiting for the right moment to say the right thing .When he has his house in order he goes in for the kill , without being being too aggressive. I mean his house is clean of all the exes , drama, girlfriends,lies emotional baggage and immaturity . He is just ready for love. Like the song says he wants her to be his" Lady".

It might seem like I have really read into this song , but when I hear it this is what I think of. With age comes maturity. As we get older , men and women are looking for relationships that are meaningful. I talk to my girl friends all the time and most say the same thing. They are ready to be with men who are ready to be with them. This post is not to male bash . Trust me I know they are a lot of women who are just as messy. This is just a reminder to men and women to step their game up .Pursuing someone is great , but if there are no good intentions, it's meaningless.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

....Slow to come...Quick to leave...

......It's over. Christmas that is . I waited all year for my favorite holiday and its gone already. I must say this Christmas for me was great ......

On this special day I laughed , cried, and reflected. I spread holiday cheer through texts and calls .I spent time with my family . I ate some goooooodddd foodd. I had 2 slices of red velvet cake. I played the Boy II Men Christmas CD 5 times. I talked to some old friends and rekindled some relationships.I realized how much I love and miss certain people. But the most important thing was I spent it with the people I love the most .

In terms of gifts God blessed me with desires of my heart and a little extra . I got everything I wanted ...maybe except one thing, but , that's not all that important. Needless to say I had a very Merry Christmas .

I know some may not have had a good Christmas. Whether it was because they reflected about losing a loved one , had no where to go , received no gifts or just were not in the spirit this year . Whatever the situation Christmas is a time to celebrate the life of Jesus and the gift of love and life . I am so grateful to have had a wonderful holiday experience.

So as Christmas now runs to 2009 , I pray everyone had a holiday experience to remember. As the New Year peeks it's head , I hope we all remember to give love everyday and be grateful.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Some of my Favorite Christmas Songs

1. Let it snow Boys II Men
2. Christmas in Jamaica Toni Braxton
3. This Christmas Donny Hathaway
4.Snowflakes of Love Toni Braxton
5.Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town The Jackson 5
6.The Little Drummer Boy The Temptations
7.Your Not Alone Boy II Men
8.All I want for Christmas Mariah Carey
9.Little Drummer Boy Destiny's Child
10.Silent Night Destiny's Child
11.8 Days of Christmas Destiny's Child
12.Joy to the world Mariah Carey
13.Oh Holy Night Christina Aguliera
14.Baby Its Cold Outside Dinah Shore Buddy Clarke
15.Christmas Ain't Christmas (Without the One You Love)" The O'Jays
16.Give Love on Christmas day Jackson 5
17.Silver Bells Bing Crosby
18.White Christmas Christina Aguliera
19. O Come All Ye Faithful Faith Evans
20.This Christmas ( By any artist that has remade it)
21. Silent Night ( By any artist that has remade it)
......................The list goes on

***Christmas is my FAVORITE holiday and time of year***

Wishing you and yours a very Merry CHRISTmas

Merry Christmas
Remember the real meaning of CHRISTmas is all in the name. CHRISTmas is the celebration of Jesus's birth. So on this holiday season when your giving those holiday gifts , give reverance to him. Say a little prayer and know it nots all about the gift receiving . It all about the giving .Be thankful for those people around you .Cherish special holiday moments. With a recession in tow, the holiday season will help you to appreciate all the little things that money cannot buy .
I wish you and yours a Merry Little Christmas.......

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Holiday Delicacy : Chitterlings

Chitterlings has been an African-American staple for decades and decades . Some run to them and others choose to runaway. Their signature smell is what makes them unique and truly a delicacy in the black community. The question lies : What exactly are Chitterlings? Where did they come from? Why are they so popular?

Chitterlings are made from hog intestines or rectum . During the time of slavery , slave masters would slaughter pigs and give the pig remains to slaves .That would include pig ears, neckbones, feet and internal organs . Slaves were forced to survive off of the foods their masters provided for them .From these remains they created southern traditions like chitterlings and souse .Chitterlings are cleaned ,boiled,and steamed. They are prepared and served over a bed of rice or noodles .Back in the day chitterlings were considered "poor people food" . It was all that poor people could afford .But chitterlings represented more than poor people , but a southern tradition.
Chitterlings are usually not served alone. They are served with other soul food dishes like macaroni and cheese, collard greens, black eyed peas, fried chicken and yams just to name a few .
Every Thanksgiving , Christmas or New Years dinner , the young and the old gather around dinner tables to eat chitterlings . In some cases,people don't need a holiday as a reason to eat chitterlings, they eat them throughout the year. Chitterlings and other southern dishes are responsible for bringing families together.However chitterlings are viewed one thing is for sure, the legacy of chitterlings will never die . It will continue to be passed from generation to generation.

"When the going gets tough..the tough gets going"

I guess its true when they say "home is where the heart is" , cause that is definitely where mine is . Don't get me wrong I love the college life , and most especially FAMU . I have just fallen out of love with being stressed everyday , and always under some kind of pressure. I'm just happy to be be able to relax, laugh and enjoy myself without any responsibility..and it feels good .Since some recent events in my life,I have started to read my bible more and find my comfort in the presence of GOD. Some people find comfort in other things to escape their reality , but my secret place lies in GOD and prayer.I have found myself walking with him alot more lately..cause when people fail you GOD will always be there. For the past few weeks , after traveling and studying , I have found myself ..BY myself . But I realized I was not by myself at all ...GOD was with me the whole time. When GOD has a point to prove or wants to show you something he gets you all alone so he can speak to you . Many may not understand..but because GOD is so awesome ..their understanding is not warranted .

When I'm surfing the Net I always see this quote "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can and wisdom to know the difference". I never really paid it any attention until I applied it in my life. There are just somethings you will never understand you just gotta look up to GOD and know that he will not put more on you than you can bare. You can't fix everything , things must be done in the right season. This year has been very interesting .I have experienced heartache, dissapointment , fear , favor , happiness...let's just say I have probably experienced every emotion possible the good and bad. This semester I have learned alot. I think one of the greatest things I have learned is not to limit myself to people,opportunities and relationships. You may surprise yourself of what can actually blossom .Sometimes with growth and maturity ,comes seperation from familiar things .Getting away from it all has made me refocus on what really matters . It has ignited this flame within me to step into my purpose and be who I was called to be . Its kinda crazy how things in your life never happen the way you plan it. How relationships you think will last forever end abruptly...
but somehow GOD places people in your life to pick up where others left off. I must say this ride called life has taken me for a spin. I am no longer that little girl who thinks everything has a happy ending. I am now a growing woman who believes in creating her own destiny . Home for me puts everything into perspective and boy do I have a BRAND NEW outlook.

A Cup of Hot Chocolate..

I was in the sixth grade when I laid my eyes on him. He walked into the room with a wide colgate smile , brown trechcoat and the Roots began to play in the background. That is when I realized the beauty of dark skin men. If you are wondering who this man is ..well it is Morris Chestnut. The place was in the theater watching "The Best Man" . He become the prototype of the man I wanted to marry . He has played the leading man in several movies like " Two Can Play that Game" , "The Brothers" , " The Inkwell" , and " Like Mike" , just to name a few. Sadly , for the last several years he has kinda fallen off. He has acted in low budget movies and lost his swag. As I sat in my living room watching TV yesterday . His picture flashed across the screen .That same smile and chiseled body And lets just say ..he took my breath away . I felt like that 12 year old again sitting in the theater. He has a starring role in the upcoming movie " Not Easily Broken". He has a redefined look with a bald head and sharper edge. I am so happy to see him back on the map and it does not hurt to have a little eye candy either.

Monday, December 22, 2008


This is my favorite CD for the holiday season. Keyshia Cole has grown as an artist and I love it .My favorite tracks on the LP are :A Different Me (Intro) and Brand New

Check this out:


When searching for the definition of the word family many definitions come up. One is any group of persons closely related by blood. The family that I come from, we share more than blood. We share an irreplaceable bond. As I have gotten older I realized that I am so fortunate to be blessed with such a dynamic family. For those who know me ,my family is my top priority. They are my place of refuge , my anchor and foundation. There are not enough words to describe what they mean to me. When I am home I can't laugh enough , eat enough or be happy enough. Family serves a reminder of where you come from. Family is more than blood or kinship , it is a relationship that teaches you to grow and keeps you going . No matter what I am going through or what situation I am running from I can always count on my family to make me see the light. I dedicate this portion of my blog to my family. They are indeed my rock.


As 2008 closes out , I am doing things a little differently. This year has truly been an experience . I have learned so much about life, people,and myself . I have learned that in life in order to get a little you must give a little. In order to succeed there are some sacrifices that must be made. Life is unpredictable and the only thing constant about it is CHANGE. The changes that have taken place in my life have molded me into becoming a better woman. I thank GOD for the people who have entered,exited and remained in my life. With the help of GOD ,family and friends...Life just keeps getting better :)